some much needed clothes-ure

before you read this, please remind yourself that i am as far from racist as one can possibly come, but there are certain things (race not withstanding) that i just can't stand. butter on white rice, umbrellas sans rain, you get the idea. having said that, picture this, if you will: the sun is shining, the breeze is blowing, the children are laughing, and there are Mexicans were swimming with clothes on. all i can say is why? why, why, why...

Joyce wisely reminded me of the fact that i am the proud owner of Ask A Mexican by Gustavo Arellano, so this morning i grabbed it off my bookshelf and furiously began searching for the answer to my burning question... why do Mexicans swim with clothes on? his answer:

According to a 2003 study by the Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development, 24 percent of Mexico's population is overweight. That's the second highest obesity rate in the world following - wait for it - los Estados Unitos! Unlike gabachos, Mexicans respect the public when it comes to flashing our flabby chichis, pompis and cerveza guts - so when we're out near the pool or by the beach we cover up. it ain't Catholicism, machismo, or an homage to our swim across the Rio Grande. It's good manner.

not exactly what i was hoping for. in fact, it's almost a cop out. then how does he account for the pleasantly large girl we saw yesterday in the wet wife beater? at one point i had almost convinced myself that she wasn't wearing a bra. she may as well have been topless...

highly unsatisfied, i launched an internet search of my own and have come up with what i believe to be a more tangible answer: long pants can be used as flotation devices.

according to ehow.com, you can literally turn long pants into a personal flotation device. simply take your pants off in the water, and tie a knot in each leg. (tip: zip up the fly if there is one.) while treading water, grab onto the waist band with each hand and throw the pants back over your head. quickly swing the waist band forward into the water, trapping a large air bubble inside. then, firmly close the waist band with your hands and slip a pant leg on either side of your face. the trapped air won’t escape, and you will have something to float with. good to know. thanks, ehow.com!